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My Co-Worker Wanted To Take Too Many Cookies, And More Of This Week's Best Work Drama
![My Co-Worker Wanted To Take Too Many Cookies, And More Of This Week's Best Work Drama](jpg/1714595926-ckelz2qi4o-2.jpg)
We're tackling something we all have to deal with at some time or other: work drama. Each week, I'll be bringing the juiciest stories from across the web right to our little virtual water cooler. From toxic bosses to nightmare workplaces, I'm here to speak a little justice on behalf of the average worker.
While you're here, please note that this weekly series is meant solely for entertainment purposes. Please do not have your HR team call me tomorrow saying you heard it from Joel at Digg.
My Co-Worker Stops Acting Friendly To Me Whenever I Bring Up Men
So my coworker and I got hired around the same time, and it took us maybe 8 months of working together before we actually exchanged contact information and started growing closer. I thought I finally had someone at work to consider a close acquaintance, but l've noticed this behavior he has when it comes to specific topics. He'll talk about dates he's been on, his previous relationships, etc., but whenever I mention someone of the opposite sex, he will give me a deadpan stare, not respond, and then eventually change the subject. I'll clarify: the first time it happened, I ran into a new hire in the break room and started talking to them. I told my coworker about it because he said he also had an encounter with him, but then he just stared at me. I waited for him to say something, and then once he didn't, I said, "Did you hear what I said?" He shrugged his shoulders, and responded, "Yeah, what do you want me to say about that?" I shook it off and went back to my work. This happened on four separate occasions. He’ll talk about his ex-girlfriend, but as soon as I try to relate the story to my ex, he'll stare at me blankly. He'll tell me one of our coworkers is cute, and I'll agree with him and tell him that she's super nice, yet when one of our coworkers came up and flirted with me (nothing serious, some people are naturally flirty), he said, "Oh, so that's what you're doing in the break room all the time, flirting with the auditors." I actually don't know what his problem is. I think I respond very well when he talks about his endeavors with women, and I won't even reach the limit he has, and yet he'll just ignore me. I’m not sure I want to mention this to him, but I want to know if this whole ordeal is odd or if I’m blowing this out of proportion.
I know she's only in her early twenties, but you're never too young to learn that there is no such thing as a “best co-worker and friend award.” I'd listen to the comments, there's a good chance this dude has a crush on you and is acting weird because of it. Regardless, don't approach him about this; I fear it'll only make things weirder. Please take this as a learning lesson too, everything you say at work can and could be used against you. You're also not the office therapist. I know you just want a young office bestie to hang with, but here's hoping for a high turn-around rate for once. Read the rest of the thread here.
I Feel Embarrassed After My Boss Told Me I Smelt Like Mold
Yeah, this just happened. My boss sat me down and said that for the past few weeks he's noticed a smell. I noticed it too when I left my apartment, it's because I've been getting non visible mold on some of my clothes. For some reason I don't even notice it until I step out of the house.
So my boss suggested I get a dehumidifier and a drying rack. Before I've just been hanging them up in my closet which I realize is a dumb thing to do. My boss even said this is adulting 101 (in a gentle way). It's been getting much more humid recently which has probably made it worse, and the country I live in now doesn't have dryers.
I only have myself to blame for being so lazy. I'm 25 and feel like a dumbass kid who can't take care of herself. I'm definitely going to go buy a dehumidifer and drying rack as soon as I get home. However I don't leave work for another 6 hours, so I basically just have to endure this extreme awkwardness and embarrassment until then.
--- Update ---
Thank you to everyone who comforted me and gave me advice, it means a lot. I was able to get all of the mildew smell out of my clothes using the ideas you suggested. I feel much better now. 🥹
I know this feels very embarrassing, but I think you can turn this around in your favor. A lot of these comments are very helpful, so following their laundry advice, spend an afternoon investing in your personal scent. Bite the bullet, go to an outlet mall and try a couple of colognes until you find one you like. Also, if you can, bring someone to serve as a co-judge. Just think about how stunned and impressed your boss will be seeing that you took his advice constructively, and that you can handle critiques others might view as harsh. Finally, you're still quite young, take solace that while you smell like rotting mold, at least you don't smell like Abercrombie & Fitch. Read the rest of the thread here.
My Co-Worker Is Mad That I Didn't Want To Give Up My Cookies For Her Large Family
I (F27) have been working at my company for a few years and a couple of months ago "Mia" (F46) started working here. I do not like her, no particular reason, we just don't mesh well.
Anyway, I bring in baked goods every now and then just as a treat for everyone in the office. I like baking and they are always gone in a few days, I always get lots of compliments and thank you's from around the office. Last week I brought in ANZAC biscuits (cookies specifically for ANZAC day, a WWI memorial day for non aus/nz people) and when Mia had some, she asked if she could take some home for all her family.
If she had 1-3 kids then sure, but she has seven kids, her mother and husband at home and she was planning to take a biscuit each for all 10 of them.
I said no, that I brought them in for our team to share. She has been pretty nasty/rude since and my boyfriend said I was probably the AH and should've just let her take them. He even suggested I apologise to keep the peace.
I don't know. Am I the asshole?
No, you tell Snow White and her seven little dwarfs that life's not fair, and you're not playing Mrs. Doubtfire here to help care for her kids. Seriously, ten whole cookies? She's asking for catering, not a favor. Also, it's unfair to your co-workers who probably appreciate the free midday sugar boost. Yeah, she needs to take her grown-self to Dairy Queen if she wants a sweet treat for her whole damn family. Just don't let her damper your spirit, your kindness is still a clear morale booster to your other, much more appreciative co-workers. Read the rest of the thread here.
Was My Honest, Self-Defensive Comment Too Rude?
I'm a married 35M and work in a small company (25 people) that has 80% women employees. Everyone there knows I'm married.
I had to conduct a virtual training session last week and always crack a stupid self-deprecating 'joke' before these kinds of things because I'm nervous.
So with everyone logged on, I said "Okay as long as no one falls asleep today, I'm going to consider the session a success". This one woman smiles and says "Oh (my name), you have such a soothing voice, you can come over and put me to sleep any time you want".
Some of the women giggled, I was taken aback, smiled and said "No thanks, I'm good" and started the presentation. Later, I get to know that she thought it was super rude of me and that she was trying to make me feel comfortable.
Was I rude? Should I apologize to her?
I'm sorry, but I'm going against the comments here today. Based on what you said, you started the meeting by making a "stupid self-deprecating joke," that was your first mistake. I understand you were nervous, but you're setting the tone of the meeting, and I really do think she was just trying to meet you halfway. That's the thing about jokes at the workplace, sometimes, we can feel so nervous not having a comeback, we just conjure it straight from you know where. Truly, I think you both just made an innocent mistake that demonstrates just this. If an apology from her would make you feel better, seek it, even if it involves HR. However, please work on developing your confidence leading a meeting, so this isn’t likely to happen again. Read the rest of the thread here.
Check out last week's edition here.
[Image credit: Josh Sorenson]