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YOU COME AT THE KING, YOU BEST NOT MISS

A Guy Unintentionally Calling His Wife Unattractive, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'

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A Guy Unintentionally Calling His Wife Unattractive, And More Of This Week's 'One Main Character'
A guy who needs his Tweets copy-edited, a billionaire CEO who's angry at people making fun of him, a popular film director who thinks AI will make good movies and another paid Twitter subscriber who thinks actual celebs pay for engagement.
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Every day somebody says or does something that earns them the scorn of the internet. Here at Digg, as part of our mission to curate what the internet is talking about right now, we rounded up the main characters on Twitter from this past week and held them accountable for their actions.



This week’s characters include a bunch of dudes — one who thinks his wife is "mid," another who thinks a famous musician is paying for likes, a famous director who thinks AI is going takeover movies, and last but not least, a billionaire CEO still crying about blue checks on Twitter.

And here are some warm-up thoughts for you, before diving in:



Saturday

Tim Sweeney

The character: Tim Sweeney, Epic Games founder and CEO, not a fan of elite-only systems

The plot: Sweeney, whose name sounds like a character out of an early Guy Ritchie film, was complaining on Twitter about the recent change to blue check marks. The guy whose company made Fortnite was (very) mad that people were doing a "block the blue" campaign to drown out accounts like Sweeney's, or those who paid for a check mark. Of course this angered Sweeney and prompted him to write an essay about how cool kids needs to stop picking on nerds.


The repercussion: Doesn't Sweeney have bigger problems, like making sure you don't union bust your employees? Sweeney thinks he's the nerd in this equation, and the cool losers are picking on him. No one cares who you are mate, it's about how long you can keep up online — and it looks like you're not built for this battle royale.


Adwait Patil



Tuesday

Charlie Carrel

The character: Charlie Carrel, guy who runs a charity, plays poker and thinks Steve Albini pays for online engagement

The plot: Steve Albini is a cool guy. I saw him play with Shellac, back in 2014, and they crushed it. Albini is also a vocal Twitter user and supports various causes that he thinks are worth fighting for, like calling bigots out on their transphobia online. Newly minted Twitter subscriber Charlie Carrel got into a quarrel with Albini, and was astonished that Albini, who doesn't pay for Twitter, was eating him up in engagement. So much so that he thought Steve was using all the money he made from producing records to pay for his likes.


The repercussion: Carrel is just the tip of the iceberg. He's indicative of the naive population of users who thought buying a blue check mark would automatically turn them into god-tier posters, when it reality it's just amplifying their stupidity.


Adwait Patil



Monday

Joe Russo

The character: Joe Russo, director, hot take connoisseur

The plot: Joe Russo gave an interview and, much like several other times recently, said something the internet did not like or agree with. He has some takes that are beyond scorching hot — they’re just bad/weird/dumb — like this one, where he says that AI is going to help "engineer" movies.


The repercussion: AI makes me groan, and having this guy (with my last name!) celebrating it is so depressing. Just a horrible career turn after doing “Avengers: Endgame” akin to the heel turn Hulk Hogan did when he became a bad guy and attacked Macho Man Randy Savage back in the WCW days.


Jared Russo



Tuesday

Ben Askren

The character: Funky, AKA Ben Askren, mixed martial artist and clumsy tweeter

The plot: Ben Askren, an MMA fighter and amateur wrestler, accidentally became one of this week's main characters when he tweeted about his wife on Tuesday.

Now, Askren obviously didn't write the tweet with the intention of calling his wife unattractive, but I think we can all agree it could've been worded better. Askren posted a series of clarifying tweets afterwards, including the one below, but by then it was too late — people were already making fun of him and accusing him of calling his wife "mid."


The repercussion:


Darcy Jimenez



———

Read the previous edition of our One Main Character column, which included two types of baby drama on a plane, another weekly bigot and a man who clearly needs to be introduced to a financial planner.


Did we miss a main character from this week? Please send tips to [email protected].

Comments

  1. John Doe 1 year ago

    Dude is a Midwest five. He shouldn't comment on anyone's looks.

  2. Jared Russo 1 year ago

    Tim Sweeney sucks

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